Pre-Christmas leftovers
Atchoo! Cough cough snort! Bah humbug! Here are some things that I did over the weekend for today as I shall be either zooming about in the bookshop or coughing up phlegm at home. How nice:
The Voyage Of The Damned trailer looks fantastic. The Curse Of Christmas Special may be broken this year:
The Daily Express still soldiers on, keeping up the pretence that it is a newspaper:
Boo hiss boo, Gordon Brown, weather, foreigners, dead blondes. Hurrah for free cars, water and other tat. Now just where did they put all the news?
For one day only (or at least until I can be bothered to find another one) it’s the return of The Monday Meme. Found at Toons ‘n’ Toons. So it is.
1. When you were born, how much did you weigh?
A long long time ago in a galaxy far far away. And I was puny human newborn weight, whatever that is. I would like to make up a tale about being an obese baby that had to be delivered in a special manoeuvre but that would be blatantly untruthful.
2. What’s you’re sugar poison?
I believe you meant to type “your” instead of “you’re” but… I cannot possible decide. Chocolate, cakes, biscuits, I love them all equally. They have never poisoned me.
3. If you had to choose between meat and cheese for the rest of your life, which would you choose? Then be specific.
Stupid question! Meat is not food. Cheese is the best food. Cheese wins!
4. What, is your opinion, is the worst song ever?
Anything warbled emotive-ly by those ‘talent’ show contestants. They can make anything shit sound shitter by using the Wobbly Hand Pitch Control while gurning. I guess Westlife and Celine Dion are a kind of genre so they win.
5. Who was your favorite teacher growing up and why?
The one with the glass eye. And I am not making that up. Although they weren’t necessarily the best, it’s just the best answer.
6. What personal activity, when performed in public, bothers you the most?
Spitting, loud mobile phone calls, loud iPods that the rest of the world can hear, crappy ringtones, smelly food eating, mobile phones that play shitty music without earphones, putting feet up on train seats, laziness, rudeness, swearing… so pretty much everything.
7. Ok, there’s a $50 bill lying on the ground. You pick it up. Dumbfounded by your incredible luck, what do you selfishly purchase?
I would purchase the equivalent in pounds by going to the bank. Then buy everyone at work some cakes.
8. Do you have a recurring nightmare? If so, explain.
I could be really flippant here and say that the quantum universe where I became like the parents, stayed in Essex, believed the Daily Mail and was horribly narrowminded but I won’t. So no.
9. Name one place on Earth you’ve never been, but vow to visit at least once.
Oh I am too lazy to plan those kind of things. Sorry.
10. You notice that question #9 wasn’t really a question. You feel smart for catching such a small detail. What else can you do really well that reminds you how smart you are?
I think that WAS a real question actually. I can tell the difference between “your” and “you’re” which is more than you can do, stoopid meme. So I believe I win.
Feed