Bloody hell, a quiet night in on my lonesome. I have already opened the Hobnobs (chocolateless ones, bah) and had too much cauliflower so now it’s time for the blog rambles about things which are good in the world of geek this week:

Lost is still on the telly and it is shit hot right now. What a vile expression but all the story threads are coming together very nicely indeed. Can’t really say much without spoiling it but this week included characters doing the following things: finally kind of having that picnic, exploding, hanging around outside a school. This is a good thing really and if you’ve given up on it I suggest getting caught up.

Treme is new to the telly that is acquired through nefarious means i.e. it’s just started in America. It’s The Jazz Wire (post-hurricane) and the first episode showed a lot of potential. It has some Wire-y people, John Goodman and the marvellous Melissa Leo who was in Homicide: Life on the Street (which we’ve just started watching on DVD. Again for me but first time for Jamie) so you know it’s got the pedigree, chum.

Also on the telly (both UK and other): Nurse Jackie series 2 is coming along nicely and is very my kind of thing. Not too dark so far this year but then I might be the wrong person to ask as I like a mix of comedy and torment for some reason. United States of Tara is also in its second sesason and also still strong. I’m still watching Heroes on the BBC but am always a few episodes behind as there’s not enough time in the day what with all the DVDs (The Horns of Nimon was time I will never get back) but I’m enjoying it as much as I did when it was a new show. Also watching Pineapple Dance Studios as it’s a marvellously dry look at deluded egomaniacs although last week’s episode where David Van Dayesque odd ‘not gay’ wannabe popstar Andrew Stone met David Van Day (also ‘not gay’) got me all confused. I believe split screen may have been used. Oh and Emmerdale. Yes, really. It knows the science behind making a soap opera that works which is nice.

With the music, I was pleased to see The Melting Ice Caps having another free single on his website and as usual it is bloody lovely. If you like your indie but not a racket one man band sensitive man with a sense of humour music you’ll love it. And so you should. Other musical things that were real money purchases have been the deluxe edition of Here Lies Love (I’ll talk about that one another time) , the album from  Codeine Velvet Club (who I blogged about last week) and some old things made new:

The S’Express Original Soundtrack album is one of my endless “I had it on tape” albums. Still got the original vinyl singles of course but now the album is back on CD with a few extra mixes, some nice photos in the booklet and it sounds great.


Ah, Lonnie Gordon! That album that allegedly never came out (I had most of the 12″s) is so very catchy, I just had to buy it. My first Stock Aitken Waterman album on CD ever in fact, although I did have Mel & Kim on cassette at the time of release. Talking of that, the b-side misx on the 12″ of Respectable is impossible to find on CD or mp3 although similarly named but mostly instrumental versions exist. Damnit.

Love it. Want it on my bloody iPod as I cannot carry my 1993 massive stereo around.

A couple of videos relating to essential new music:

Sia’s new album is coming soon!

So is The Pipettes new album. The single is out and should have arrived in the post but so far no show.

D’Anna from Battlestar Galactica faffed about on the fracked-up ***** (no spoilers) and then turned up on The L Word, investigating the death of one of the main characters (in the swimming pool), which was interesting. A murder mystery on top of the artistic integrity plot about the movie based on the lives of the characters in the show? … very post-modern and all that. With most of the episode being a flashback is it the lesbian Lost? Is ***** going to be the new Laura Palmer? God I hope not.

In good news, the remaining three episodes of Pushing Daisies are due to be shown on ITV as season two starts next Friday and they are showing all 13 of them.

Lost was back too, and so was Doctor Marvin Candle. Hurrah! Also: Nosebleeds, flaming arrows, Cheech, that cute kid, timey wimey nonsense… you get the idea.

We tried to watch that new BBC Four comedy called Cowards but it unfortunatley inspired zero smiles after five minutes so we donged the imaginary gong and turned it off.

The Daily Mail had some corkers today:

Might not be the best parenting idea to pose with the daughter you don’t love in a national newspaper, dear.

A little opinion poll with surprising results:

I was kidding. Miserable fucks in their big houses, the lot of them. Are they “finished” yet?

And Michelle Ryan? Why not? she does have nice tits after all.

Weekend time is telly catch-up time. So that’s what I did. And I half regretted it…

As an old geek I remember Get The Freebies which existed in that weird way of being a monthly comic strip in a trendy fash mag slag mag aka The Face. I miss The Face, are there any magazines like it now? I have to buy Attitude for my pop and film (and gay) nonsense, Q for my music and (The) Word for a bit of the other, but in its prime The Face was pretty good stuff. Anyway, I digress. Someone thought it would be a good idea to turn Get The Freebies into a tv thing called Phoo Action for the newly-yoof-ed-up BBC Three and so they did. There was nothing really horrible about it but it should have just been left alone, kind of like its distant cousin That Forgettable Tank Girl Movie. It’s got a full series forthcoming so maybe I should give it another go and watch it when I’m not in a grumpy mood (and doing the ironing). I don’t know why I have a hate thing for Jaime Winstone who played Whitey, maybe it’s a combination of Kewl/Famous Dad/Partytime/Annoying Face. Kind of like Lily Allen then (although I have her album and it isn’t all that bad).

Talking of Lily Allen… BBC Three thought it would be a good idea to give her a chat show but it was so horribly edited to death in the ‘chat’ bits (poor David Mitchell didn’t really look like he was relaxed at all) and the ‘interactive’ bits that I managed to stick with showcased random Lily MySpazz ‘friends’ who had basically been dickheads or twats and thought that was a good way of getting on the telly. It made me realise that I am too old for this kind of thing but there is an audience for it so who am I to judge? I am Earl Grey to BBC Three’s Bacardi Breezer. Keep the internet on the internet where it belongs, teevee!

Talking of yoof…

Skins appears to be, from its trailers, like a version of Hollyoaks with more sex, swearing and drugs. But it’s really not at all, oh no. Episode one had Bill Bailey line dancing with a dog, a nice gay teen plot that wasn’t remotely “oh woe iz me, I iz a gay”, an interesting attempt to make the cocky bastard character watchable by having him mentally and physically disabled after a road accident (I don’t think I am sympathetic yet), some plots that are actually going somewhere, and great dialogue. So not Sweary Druggy Hollyoaks at all, although we do love our Hollyoaks for its utterly inconsistent useless random shitness. Kind of like Torchwood Series one without the rift in space and time.

Lost continued to impress, with its new set-up giving us flash forwards instead of ye olde flashbacks. This week Sayid played a fatal round of golf, became a kind of famous non-secret version of Jason Bourne, had a nice cup of coffee with a lady and worked for someone he really shouldn’t have. Guns r bad, m’kay? Meanwhile, back in the present which is now technically the past, (on the island) the new guy from Spanking The Monkey was still really twitchy and discovered something odd about time zones, it didn’t rain for once, and nobody died. My description sounds quite shit actually but trust me on this, ok?

It’s still got it.

I love a new sitcom pilot so I thought I’d give Welcome To The Captain a try. It’s got Jeffrey Tambor from Arrested Development, Larry Sanders and tons of other good things in it after all… but oh dear oh no. The premise is as follows: Josh (Fran Kranz, from nothing I have ever seen) is a struggling screenwriter coming out of a failed relationship (meh) who just so happens to get the opportunity to move into his ‘wacky’ college friend Marty (Chris Klein from American Pie)’s apartment building (The Captain) which is supposed to be full of fun exciting people or something. So he does, and meets sexy accupuncturist Hope who is blonde, a bit scatty and makes him nervous (how original), failed lothario Saul (a role that wastes the talent of Jeffrey Tambor), a Mexican called Jesus and pronounced like the son of God (double meh), and Raquel Welch who plays an ageing glamourous ex-tv star (what a stretch) … and hilarity ensues, except it doesn’t. That’s pretty much it. I didn’t smile once although I was intrigued by the strangely plastic Chris Klein From American Pie’s hair length which kept changing back and forth throughout the episode (how hard is continuity, people? I assume there were reshoots but come on now) and looked decidedly like a Nicolas Cage hairline. i was baffled by the odd lead actor who has a girl’s name what sort of rhymes (Fran Kranz) but plays the role like a Bargain Range Jason Bateman / Ellen Degeneres Hybrid (which is about as fun as it sounds), and Raquel Welch’s teeth which seem to be far too white and numerous for her elderly mouth.

It’s as bad as those American sitcoms (“You don’t say!”) that are always trailed on E4, just before I turn the telly off. Avoid!

On the other hand, episode 2 of Lost series 4 was fantastic. We get to meet the new bunch of characters who have landed on the island who are, according to the flashback from a recently-deceased character, the headcase (Jeremy Davies from Spanking The Monkey and a hundred other fims) , the ghost buster (Ken Leung from loadsa indie stuff), the anthropologist (Rebecca Mader who actually is English like her character but not quite from Essex) and the drunk (Jeff Fahey from a thousand straight to video films of the 90s). Lines uttered include “there were no survivors of Oceanic flight 815″ and “what is the monster?” The episode was written by Drew Goddard (Buffy, Angel, Cloverfield, new Buffy comic) and Brian K Vaughan (Y:The Last Man, Ex Machina, Runaways, new Buffy comic) so that explains why it was so good.

Lost season four is showing on ABC in America, Sky One in the UK and The Sneaky Internet for everyone else. It’s grrreat, like Frosties.

It’s the day of (mostly) rest today so here’s some recommended geek bits…

That Hercules & Love Affair track is almost out. Some of you have heard it and like it. Here is the video:

It’s a bit naughty and when I think about it, kind of disappointing. I don’t know why Ray Winstone’s daughter annoys me so much but she does. Maybe because she has a boy’s name and what with Antony singing the song it’s so genderbendery that I think it’s 1984 again. The year, not the Orwell book that you will find under O in your bookshop’s fiction section. Not G.

Out of context panel of the day:

While Manhunter is (still) on (bloody) hiatus we have Birds Of Prey to give us out monthly fix of Kate Spencer and her ginormous glow stick weapon. And pants-spying.

Buffy issue 12 has another damn fine cover:

It’s out on the 5th of March, written by Drew Goddard From Buffy (and Lost. Which is good again. Have you checked out the webisodes yet?) and I appear to have a thing for strong women… but not in a Geoff Capes With Boobs kind of way.

Hooray for Saturday, where I watch the return of Lost (more on that later), purchase treats from Waitrose, see Cagney from Cagney & Lacey turn a (live) man into a (dead) human teddy bear in Nip/Tuck, don’t go to work, catch up on the next disc of The Shield Season 2, cook a stir fry, finally shave off that beard, sort out the mess that is my mp3 collection and the CDs that are taking over the house, catch up on this week’s new comics, use a whole lotta Cillit Bang, not decide what I would like for my birthday and get a bit nearer to the end of the latest Dexter novel. Phew!

Lost is back, at last, and it’s regained its mojo. Season 4 episode 1 had a bit of everything for everyone and none of the dragginess that dragged the first chunk of season 3 out, sending us all to sleep. There are far too many names in the opening credits, the flashbacks flash forward (again) as well as backwards, the weather in the jungle goes all rainy at short notice, Hurley has a chat with a ghost, two deaths are announced to the group, someone lands from the sky (again) and people cry (again). If you lost (pun intended) your way last year it’s a great time to give it another go and there’s a ‘previously on Lost’ clipshow thing doing the rounds, which will help.

Shame about that bloody strike cocking things up and giving us an eight episode season. Yes, only eight bloody episodes.

Gratuitous male flesh moment of the week:

Oh look! It’s Kevin Zegers from the world of films! With eyeliner!

No. He isn’t. Now go away and think about how you have wasted all of our time.

We came 4th in the pub quiz but learnt a great deal of random facts. I realised (in my own unique world) that Sylvia Plath probably invented Emo and on the way home I decided to set up a road safety organisation for foxes. The pesky things kept running out in front of the (ginger beer) car. They aren’t cunning at all and should take a leaf out of the squirrels’ book who had that Tufty Club thing in the olden days. All the foxes could come up with was Glacier Mints. And they’re rubbish!

Look what arrived in the post today! It’s not out until 18th June and it costs approximately £17.99… but I have a few perks of the job and I shall bloody well show off when I get the rare chance. I love managing a bookshop and having a very good friend who works at a publishing company, oh yes.

It’s big, it’s hard, it’s rather gay and it’s yellow. No, it’s not a controversial plot from the forthcoming Simpsons Movie, it’e the new Armistead Maupin novel and it focuses on the key character from the way old Tales Of The City series. It might be a cliche but those books helped me sort my head out when I was in The Bad Place many many years ago so I definitely making this my Book Of The Week. Expect a review once I have read it (and maybe even a key bookshop window placement) but until then here’s the Amazon synopsis:

‘Michael Tolliver, the sweet-spirited Southerner in Armistead Maupin’s classic “Tales of the City” series, is arguably the most beloved gay character in fiction. Now, almost twenty years after ending his groundbreaking saga of San Francisco life, Maupin revisits his all-too-human hero, letting the 55-year-old gardener tell his story in his own voice. Having survived the plague that took so many of his friends and lovers, Michael has learned to embrace the random pleasures of life, the tender alliances that sustain him in the hardest of times, “Michael Tolliver Lives” follows its protagonist as he finds love with a younger man, attends to his dying fundamentalist mother in Florida, and finally reaffirms his allegiance to a wise octogenarian who was once his landlady. While Maupin insists that this book is not, strictly speaking, a continuation of “Tales of the City”, a reassuring number of familiar faces appear along the way. As usual, the author’s mordant wit and ear for pitch-perfect dialogue serve every aspect of the story – from the bawdy to the bittersweet. “Michael Tolliver Lives” is a novel about the act of growing older joyfully and the everyday miracles that somehow make that possible.’

I am ditching that previous Book Of The Week memoir thing involving Doctor Who and a happy childhood, and diving straight into this one today.

Lost is done for another year… and it was even sillier than the Heroes finale. I don’t want to say much else except…

.. I bloody hate that Driveshaft song too so I don’t blame her for giving Charlie a bloody big slap.

We finally saw Magicians. It was basically fine. That is all…

… but we love Jessica Hynes far more than the film itself:
“Women now define themselves through their lifestyle, by their shoes and sofa throws. One hundred years ago, women defined themselves much more by their character and their interests.”
She’s in The Guardian today.
“I’ve written a children’s book and I’m looking for a publisher … God. I am Daisy Steiner”.
Just don’t mention The Very Bad Thing At Pinewood!

Oh how great is this short clip of Catherine Tate being surprised that the Bafta a lot of people thought she would win did in fact go to Mitchell and Webb? No offence to Ms Tate but does she look bovv… (snip!)

I am tired. And uninspired.

So here’s some good old fashioned Daily Mail hate for a Thursday, mate.

Great.

That Catholic Dude with the really very Irish name has been moaning about them gays and their ‘special rights’ to not be discriminated against by those Catholics. Again. Yada yada yada. Mister Cardinal Cormac Murphy-O’Connor (to be sure) said that the new laws to stop intolerance and bigotry were in fact intolerant. Like that makes any sense. He said, in between being discriminated against by people, “My fear is that, under the guise of legislating for what is said to be tolerance, we are legislating for intolerance. Once this begins, it is hard to see where it ends.” I wonder where he thinks it ends. Is it, like those Mail readers might say, political correctness gone mad to not treat them lovely poofs as inferior just because they happen to like a bit of the other kind of how’s yer father? Or is it intolerant to actively persue the closing down of adoption agencies that look after vulnerable kids just because there might be a small chance that one of those kids might one day be looked after by a loving couple who like it a bit gaywise? I know what I think is more wicked. And I don’t mean that in the word of da yoof way. Right, I am off out with my Buy One Get One Half Price When You Go Gay leaflets. There’s a lot of promotion of homosexuality to be done, damnit!

I think a Catholic conversion is even less likely than a loft conversion. And I certainly do not need the space.

Only two more days to go now…

Billie Who?

If anyone is having doubts about continuing watching Lost then don’t. I enjoyed this week’s episode. That’s three in a row now. Blimey.

Next week: Girlfight!

I don’t know whether I loved or hated Lost this week (episode 8). It was either very clever or very corny. I do know that I don’t get that ‘special feeling’ that I used to get when watching it. Bah. I am maybe too much of a geek and have seen everything before on other shows / in comics / etc. Oh well. Only fools are enslaved by time and space, or so the backwards voices say in last week’s mentalism bit:

What I am watching and very much enjoying is Stephen Fry playing Booth aka Angel aka David Boreanaz’s shrink in Bones. It’s forensic investigation but it’s certainly no CSI. CSI:Nerds? Anybody? No? Alright then, how about some tea?

It’s the weekend but I am worker. I am covering for a certain MySpacer who is on holiday so I get to mix with the weekend shoppers who are a little bit ‘different’ to the weekday ones. Roll on the end of next week when I get my next holiday week. Before that I have quite a few shifts plus a big meeting in London which can mean only one thing: A trip to the bestest most forbidden of all planets.*

Oh, Manhunter. Such quality but it’s all about to end. Boo hiss boo, DC Comics!

* It’s a comicshop. I am a geek after all.

It’s all the bits and pieces for nerds that wouldn’t fit anywhere else…

In keeping with the geek rule of every comic-related film, Heroes (which is not actually a film but nevermind) has got a certain icon with impossible hair doing the obligatory cameo soon.

Did somebody mention Gwen Stacy?

Patrick Wolf is in The Guardian! He’s not got the right elements to become the next Mika, unfortunately, but it’s almost time for The Magic Position. Hopefully not the same one Paul Daniels does with The Lovely Debbie McGee though.

I watched the long-awaited new episode of Lost yesterday. It were alright but it’s as slow as Jade Goody on Countdown. More answers, more questions, more shouting at my computer. Much better and with no hype at all was Bones where Booth shoots an ice cream van clown and has to go see an English psychiatrist who talks about latin words and makes lots of tea and just happens to be played by that Stephen Fry. Meanwhile, the science geeks investigate the dude from Bill and Ted who wasn’t Keanu Reeves.

Either I’m getting good or 24 is getting lazy. I guessed the ‘shocking’ twists this week straight away. I am loving George from Six Feet Under as Jack’s old yet very tall father and Doctor Romano from ER as Jack’s shorter and balder brother.

Geek Monthly (yes, really) has a nice big interview with Joss Whedon. What more can I say?

Why is Dawn rather oversized? You’ll have to buy the comic. Soon.