I finally watched the Caprica pilot (it’s a TV show ‘premiere’ episode, not a man who works in planes) and it was rather good. What a brilliant reviewer I am!

Obviously there was more to it than this, as it comes from the same place as Battlestar Galactica (but it’s not its Torchwood, oh no) so features a world we have visited before only a bit further back in time. The prequel to a complex not-just-sci-fi show whose main themes were what humanity is capable of in order to survive, terrorism seen from both sides, how different types of religion can live together and of course Fighting! In space! is going to be an interesting proposition and Caprica lived up to my expectations. This show is closer to our world in its technology so there are versions of early artificial intelligence, virtual reality group player games (with better avatars than my Wii Mii), religion-based terrorism and faith schools (ooh), plus some good old fashioned family bickering thrown in for good measure. No space stuff though, so it’s just kind of sci-fi. Hmmm… I like a nice dollop of philosophy in my entertainment for I am slightly pretentious and Caprica gives you a fair bit to think about (simple plot: rich boffin’s stroppy daughter gets involved with monotheistic terror group while working on a genius level AI version of herself. Shit hits fan. Another family are affected and their lives overlap) although this never becomes too technical or talk-downy. The whole thing looks really pretty, with good music which comes as no surprise to fans of Galactica. Good stuff which would work well on BBC Four (lazy Mad Men comparison, apologies).

Talking of sci-fi-y stuff based around issues of identity, technology and ‘what makes a human human?’ I also watched the final Dollhouse. This finale goes back to the futuristic 10 years later world (Echo had a grey streak to show this) last seen at the end of season one in the episode that Fox never showed in America. It may have been shown over here, I know it was on the DVD. Anyway, it was a good ending as it actually ended the story which is a rarity in these axe-happy telly times, but the whole project has never felt all that brilliant. Maybe I’m being tough on Joss Whedon and co as they have a great body of work and I expected too much, maybe it was a bit ropey. The crapness of the first half of season one certainly did not help and it really needed to be a serial in the format of 24 rather than a ‘job of the week’ show like some other thing that I don’t watch. The premise was shaky at best and choosing an actress with a limted range to play the main character who gets through a lot of different peronalities may not have helped. She does a good Faith From Buffy though. Dollhouse was always better as an ensemble piece and had a handful of great episodes but as one big saga it is far too erratic.

The other talky thinky sci-fi I liked this week, and in fact only listened to as it is a play, was A Thousand Tiny Wings. This was a Doctor Who audio and an excellent one at that, showing how to do a scary Sylvester McCoy story right. Set in 1950s Kenya, it manages to mix an unhappy reunion between the Doctor and an old enemy who happens to be from a Nazi timeline (see old play Colditz for that story. Co-starring David ‘Who?’ Tennant), a group of women living in fear of the Mau Mau in a farm house, a mysterious injured non-human found in the jungle and something sinister involving groups of tiny dangerous birds… hence the title. I’m not giving anything else away except to say that it is a particularly good example of how to use the audio format for suspense and drama, with a nice amount of philosophy and politics thrown in (not in a dull way, I promise, even the whole debate about Nazism is interesting and fits the story) to the mix. Big Finish have been on top form recently and this one kept me gripped, like my 16 year old self watching Ghost Light all those years ago but with a story that is easier to understand.

I’m so behind with my comic waffle. Got a bumper week of new stuff to read so here are some highlights form the last fortnight …

Angel comic is very hit and miss but new writer Bill ‘Fables’ Willingham may be able to sort it out:

Gotta love those floating purple telepathic fish. Only in comics (probably).

Buffy has also been a bit crap/good/crap recently but they ‘leaked’ (on purpose) a big future revelation (not spoiling it here for non-comic website geeks) and sales may go up. Anyway:

I am such a nerd.

Other odd Buffy plot (which is not a spoiler now) is the slightly iffy Xander/Dawn thing. Here’s the blatant justification from Mister Whedon:

Not all my comics are TV tie-ins but…

I should stop now.

That issue of New Avengers was quite fun. Art currently being done by Stuart ‘Nextwave’ Immonen if that means anything to you. It does to me.

Meanwhile, Spider-Woman is still pretty but sloooooow:

She thinks too much, bless her.

While I remember, Talk About The Passion Magazine issue one arrived and is wonderful. You can buy it here and look at my column*

*Not a penis reference.

Honest.

Shocking news in today’s Daily Mail:

Seven-year-olds will be taught to oppose sexist and homophobic bullying in schools.

A shake-up of sex education will also see children learning to ‘ recognise and challenge stereotypes’.

The Government also wants to make sex classes compulsory for 15-year-olds.
Ed Balls, the Children’s Secretary, launched the guidelines yesterday, saying they would help young people ‘understand the importance of marriage and other stable relationships’.
They would also equip children to cope with television, the internet, films and magazines which persuade them toward having early sex, he said.

Sounds sensible to me, and this kind of thing would have been most appreciated in my schooldays era as that was not exactly a barrell of laughs. I wonder what Mail readers think?

Exhibit A: The flabbergasted person:

Reading, Riting and Rithmatic? Replaced by Rogering, Rimming and Rolling about in a gay manner of course! Can someone please ask Flippin Heck how a spider crab writes?

Exhibit B: The sensible outsider:

Massive thumbs down from Maily Wailers as they love bullying, but nice try!

Exhibit C: The CAPS LOCK MENTALIST:

YESZ!

Exhibit D: The baffling commenter:

I am returning my gay megaphone to the gay shop first thing tomorrow.

Exhibit E: Me:

No idea how I got in the positive with the opinion arrows.

Exhibit F: The serious point raiser:

We would rather kids put up with horrible lives until they kill themselves or go a bit loopy: the silent majority speaks.

Nice people.

Nice day out today which didn’t include the following scene excactly…

We went to the belowzero (lower case like famous lesbian singers who are a little bit country) ice bar place in Fancy London where it was rather cold but at least we were given gorgeous blue capes with lovely gloves attached on strings…

I didn’t fancy getting vodka’d in the afternoon so had a non-alcoholic ‘cocktail’ of fruit juice which was very nice.

Nice capes.

But is it art?

I lost most of the feeling in my fingertips after 25 minutes but it was a good place to visit. Got stuck talking to a random old lady who told me that she had avoided the expensive ‘refill’ prices by having several drinks elsewhere before arriving, which was nice. Old ladies love me for some reason.

Busy week featuring a crashed mail server, a deceased CD-ROM drive, too many Excel spread sheets (which weren’t all that bad really), a bit of lurgey (I refuse to call it man flu) and then a lovely relaxing day today… so here are some videoey things that piqued my interests this week:

Marina did Hollywood in an acoustic style:

Ellie’s new video was quite nice:

There was also a lot of telly too. Big Love series 4 started in America and it followed the goodness of series 3. The previous one seemed to lack a bit of oomph and there may have been too many plotines (HBO style) but this hard-to-get-into show is currently in smashing form:

New theme tune and title sequence: Excellent. Clips trailer:

Whatshername who is now more famous since being in that bloody Abba film is leaving but at least she had some scenes with Mac From Veronica Mars and Jesse From Breaking Bad, finishing off her storyline. I don’t think I can recomend starting watching it from the current episodes as too much has happened but investing in the box sets is a good idea. Mac From Veronica Mars is also in a new ABC mainstream legal drama called The Deep End which I watched purely for that reason but it was all too cliched and mainstream like “real” popular telly:

I imagine this will appeal to ‘normal’ people though as it is full of cliche speeches and office romances.

24 is back and just as mad as ever:

It has Starbuck hunting for Leoben at one point, how very Battlestar Galactica of them. Those Cylons get everywhere, and the first few episodes of the new series also include familiar faces from The Shield and The Wire.

I finally started on Heroes season 4 today and was pleasantly surprised:

Liking the new ‘Carnivale’ plot (the baddie of that show is in The Deep End) and characters, and even the ‘Undeclared’ plot is ok. I predict some kind of lesbionic tendencies in Clare Bear’s mate, how very modern. The double length first episode was good stuff, with only some of the Hiro and Ando stuff grating but then the ‘comic relief’ aspect of the show never really did it for me.

Also continued to enjoy Ed & Oucho’s Excellent Inventions, Being Human and Nurse Jackie, and found Bellamy’s People (new BBC2 comedy) to be worth my time:

If you’re still sulking about That Peter Serafinowicz Show not getting a 2nd series and would love a new funny sketch show that has lots of ideas, fronted by a man who can also write (and direct and animate) and perform comedy then you could do a lot worse than check out Limmy’s Show… on BBC2 in Scotland but not in good old England as we don’t like that sort of thing apparently. It is, however, on the iPlayer so play away we must…

iPlayer episode one (for now)

iPlayer episode 2 (for a while)

I don’t want to ruin any gags or situations (much) so here are two clips that you should enjoy. One is a recurring character, the other is a little one-off:

I got so excited I made a badly made collage:

Brian Limond (for it is he) is on Twitter as @BrianLimond , which makes sense.

We went to Ye Olde Brentwood Town yesterday to see my nice brother (as opposed to nasty brother) and his husband (gay power!), where we wandered around the town a little bit in a kind of Heritage Walk style. Of interest to nobody except me was the discovery that my childhood dentist was still A) practicing and B) alive although A couldn’t relaly happen without B. But anyway, other excitement was to be found in the ‘new’ shopping precinct which was like the old one only with a lid on it and just as many empty shops as before (someone may have seen the Victoria centre in southend and had a lightbulb go off in their head), a mini mooch past some all-new-all-exciting shops and oh so many bars and restaurants. In my day a pizza in Pizza Hut would have been considered exotic (especially if it had chilli on it), how we have grown as a town. Quite a nice place but don’t tell anybody I said that.

I also admired their massive garden (lovely shed) and conservatory (middle class) and spent some time in the loft conversion (fancy) rummaging through boxes that contained some of my old old tat. I took ghome a large plastic tub of mostly the 80s and here are some of the highlights:

Google image search is my friend.

Human League: Dare album on vinyl bought in Belgium in 1882 (cool kid) with four faces on front instead of usual one.

Sonia: You’ll Never Stop Me From Loving You 12″ remix to the music of French Kiss by Lil’ Louis (I still love this).

Yazoo: Upstairs At Eric’s vinyl album also bought in Belgium, when I stayed with my lesbian ‘aunties.’

Propaganda: A Secret Wish album on cassette (chrome for quality, ya know) and the singles on 7″ vinyl.

More ZTT singles including ones by Act and Frankie Goes To Hollywood. Never found my Two Tribes variants though.

Sponsored walk certificate from Pilgrim’s Hatch Junior School 1981. 20 laps!

Wee Papa Girl Rappers: Blow The House Down 12″ single with cut out extra outer sleeve in the shape of a house. Shite.

Father Abraham In Smurfland album with my name written on the front so I could not pretend it was not mine.

Jesus Loves You: One On One 12″ remix by Massive Attack (scratched at the beginning of side A).

She Hulk graphic novel. Camp.

Wild Bunch (proto Massive Attack) vinyl EP featuring Shara Nelson and a lot of rapping.

Lisa Stansfield: Time To Make You Mine 12″ with remixes by Youth & The Orb and Masters At Work. Nudey cover!

It’s good to share:

So now you know.

Would The Daily Mail ever put the Haiti story on their front pages? Surely with all the 24 hour news coverage of developments they would find something they perceive as worth featuring?

Not when you can moan about poor old middle class English people having a higher heating bill due to it being rather nippy and you have a Miss Marple DVD to give away. Add some royal tedium and hey presto, what earthquake?

Old wimmin avin’ babies? Eh? What’s all that about? Plus daughter of famous old rockstar bloke is heavily insinuated as having done a bit of the drugs. Shocking.

Anyway, here’s a link to the DEC where Mail readers and normal people can do something to help.

With tens of thousands dead and millions displaced after the horrific earthquake in Haiti you would think all the national newspapers would have it as their lead story yesterday, wouldnt you? Even the Daily Star had it on their cover, admittedly only a small box as some tits and celebrities (or was it celebrity tits? It’s all the same to me) took the main story…

All national newspapers except one.

Can you guess which?

Well…

If some middle class Brits (no not the record industry awards) were amongst the dead then it may have been a different matter but dead brown people do not matter all that much to this particular target audience. That tiresome hacker (no not this one), that bloody MacCann woman and a free Poirot DVD are far more important.

Surely The Mail would learn their lesson and put Haiti on the cover today?

Of course not! A Daily Express-style batshit health story, Beyonce in a leotard (or something) and a little bit more free Poirot!

Bravo, you shits.

I do so love it when so-called journalists earn a small bloody fortune by rehashing pre-existing flimsy newspaper stories and conveniently don’t bother to check any of their facts (far too much work when you already have an agenda-driven piece ready to publish), causing their sheep, sorry, fans to get all defensive. Take the England-hating Florida resident Richard Littlejohn who managed to re-use what was at best a stretch of the truth along with one of his favourite crowd-pleasing dollops of bullshit:

Smyleene Myleene Klass allegedly got told off by police for waving a kitchen knife at some garden intruders from the safety of her window, according to her agent whose job it is to get her publicity. Agent bloke Jonathan Shalit said :

‘Myleene was utterly terrified. She was aghast when she was told that the law did not allow her to defend herself in her own home. All she did was scream loudly and wave the knife to try and frighten them off. She is not looking to be a vigilante, and has the utmost respect for the law, but when the police explained to her that even if you’re at home alone and you have an intruder, you are not allowed to protect yourself, she was bemused.’

Littlejohn loved this as it gave him the opportunity to hate our police force from the safety of his gated Florida mansion but if he had done anything resembling research he would have seen this quote on BBC news from the police force in question:

“Officers spoke to reassure the home owner, talked through security and gave advice in relation to the importance of reporting suspicious activity immediately to allow officers to act appropriately. For clarification, at no point were any official warnings or words of advice given to the home owner in relation to the use of a knife or offensive weapon in their home.”
Mr Shalit could not immediately be reached for further comment.

Funny, that.

The big lie of the day was this little nugget of a paragraph, ironiclaly written by someone whose columns give out pretty much the same message as the BNP’s website:

The equalities commission is within its rights to prosecute the BNP for dragging its feet over lifting the ban on non-white members. But these Toytown Nazis need to be beaten at the ballot box, not in court. Sending Nick Griffin to prison on a technicality will only feed their sense of victim-hood and martyrdom. Especially when other overtly racist organisations – the Black Police Association, for instance – are free to carry on with impunity.

The Black Police Association, you say?

What? This Black Police Association?

All it would have taken was a glimpse at their homepage but why bother when repeating a myth / lie can so your job so much easier? Several people tried to point out this ‘white people cannot join the NBPA’ story (a favourite lie of a certain type of puny human) but were all downrated by the Mail’s comments vote system…

Criag didn’t like me very much but then to him I am some kind of loony lefty. His point made no sense to me (quite literally, I am not just being flippant)…

Craig never did explain how I would be upset if there was a white police officers association, even if it did let white people in. Did he mean that it would only have black police officers in it until they would be made to change their entry policy to include white people? Why would black people want to join a white police officers association anyway? And why would a majority group need to have their own minority interests group?

Then my head exploded so I had a cup of tea.